I know you have alot to say
Why don't you just come out and say it
You keep your feelings to yourself

Are you afraid, its me, you can say it

At times I peer into your world

But everything seems unclear

A cloud of uncertainty hovers above

Thats when that feeling takes over, fear

So many times I wanted to

Just tell you everything's alright

To give you a kiss, a pinch and a hug

To say "babe lets not fight"

Your words are just as sharp as mine
They can pierce or rightfully defend
At times you may not see your deeds
So hurtful, no "Sorry" can mend

But the thing I find, I fear the most
Its not when you don't call
Its the many times I anticipate
But still, you say nothing at all.

This blog entry is long overdue, I know, I've been slack. But i have my reasons. The past month has seemed like a rollercoaster ride, the usual ups and downs, but this time abit too many downs for comfort. Physically, emotionally, mentally, spiritually.... I've been sick. Things just haven't been going right recently and i find myself questioning "why is all this happening to me, why can't i keep it together?", and more often than not, I feel I should have control of things, I am the master of my destiny, I can be perfect, I can make things work the way they should..... oh, how wrong was I!

Things have settled down now, and I've learnt to let things happen, I don't have to be in control of things, not everything is perfect and nobody really cares anyway (and I don't mean that in a bad way). So now, I've stepped off the rollercoaster ride, looking back in retrospect, I enjoyed it.

I'm thankful of all the wonderful people who have come and gone in the past month or so, Gwen, Stephy aka Waaaaaah, Reg aka Bok Nia Koi, Milhouse aka man with f&#king smelly shit... I'm disappointed that I couldn't spend more time with some but all left a lasting impression.

Last but not least, I have to acknowledge Lid, she have brought more grief to my life than any other person I know. At the same time, she is my bestfriend. The level of understanding we have is unmatched and I wouldn't trade her for the world *ponders*, well, I'd trade her in for a couple of days a month.. but thats all.

And as most people know, she is also a great source of entertainment. But I bet not many people know that she's a part-time arsonist (it happened again!!!), a hidden talent with few limitations.... *winkz*